"Love is Jesus Christ"
/Our previous message, “Love is impossible”, lays the foundation for this week and next. But first, it is worth noting that Love Dare was written not only to strengthen marriages, but also to address those who do not know Christ.
The material in these three chapters is probably familiar to most believers, so some will be tempted to gloss over it. Others may feel that they contain too much theology and not enough practical application. Regardless of your opinion on the content and presentation, do not to overlook this foundational truth — Jesus needs to be at the center of your marriage. Continuing from last time in 1 John 4, verse 8 says, “The one who does not love does not know God.” This challenges us to grasp God’s deep love for us. He not only created and sustains us, but has given us the gift of His son Jesus Christ (see John 3:16).
God’s justice requires eventual judgement for our sin and everyone stands guilty (Romans 6:23). Yet in His love and mercy, “God sent His only begotten Son into the world that we might live through Him” (1 John 4:9). Jesus showed His love by dying for us (John 15:13), so if you ever feel unloved, you are not looking at the cross. Reflect on God’s unwavering love by reading the following passages:
Love this deep cannot be fully understood. (Romans 5:6-8)
Love like this cannot be earned. (Ephesians 2:8-9)
This love must be received. (Romans 10:9-10)
We are called to love one another. (1 John 3:16)
I often mention our need to “always go vertical first.” Hopefully this has been a helpful reminder, not an overlooked admonishment. I repeat it frequently because this is the key to any healthy Christian relationship — especially marriage, which God created to be the most intimate of all human relationships. Don’t fall into the trap that “If I just add a little Jesus to my life, everything will be easier.” It doesn’t work that way. He needs to be at the center, not an add-on.
In “The Meaning of Marriage”, Tim Keller writes: “Plenty of people who do not acknowledge God or the Bible, yet who are experiencing happy marriages, are largely abiding by God’s intentions, whether they realize it or not. But it is far better if we are conscious of those intentions. And the place to discover them is in the writings of the Scripture.”
If you have yet to accept Christ, I urge you to make this your top priority. And for anyone who knows Jesus but has strayed, repent and return to Him. Only when you receive love through Jesus Christ can you sacrificially love others. God’s presence as “the third strand” in your marriage makes it stronger (see Ecclesiastes 4:12). It enables you to love even when you are not loved in return. It enables you to see their imperfections yet still choose to love them. It enables you to become God’s instrument, one of the most personal ways He meets the needs of your spouse. As a result, they can walk in the fullness and blessing of your love. True love is found in Jesus Christ.